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Credit for digital music: "Come Fill My Heart" by Elton Smith, Larry Holder and Steve Israel/Songs of Praise)
It's Time for Tickles 'n Truth A Fun, Faith 'n Funny Bone Feature
"Funny Bone Faith" sees humor--AND faith--in the tough times and with God's help, smiles through tears as it triumphs in a Lord who brings joy and laughter to our lives--daily! Enjoy the fun and inspiration--and strengthen YOUR "Funny Bone Faith" right here--today!
NOTE: Humor pieces are meant to be funny. No offense is meant with regard to age, sex, race, religion, occupation or any other topic. It is simply a way of laughing at ourselves, so please just laugh along with us!
Today's Tickles!
"Mikey's Thoughts from Mikey's Funnies - Part Two"
~ Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW.~ Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
~ Home is where you hang your @.
~ How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
~ How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a barbecue?
~ How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
~ I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect.
~ I asked Mom if I was a gifted child...she said they certainly wouldn't have paid for me.
~ I don't find it hard to meet expenses. They're everywhere.
~ I eat swiss cheese from the inside out.
~ I figured out why they call our language the "Mother Tongue." Fathers never get a chance to use much of it.
~ I have excellent sleeping habits. When the sun rises, I don't.
~ I hate mornings...they're so early!
~ I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say, "Well, that's not going to happen."
~ I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
~ I was thinking about old age. I decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball but you're just too tired to bounce it.
~ If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose? ~ If a firefighter fights fire and crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
~ If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
~ If a tin whistle is made out of tin (and it is), then what exactly is a fog horn made out of?
~ If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
~ If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
~ If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?
~ If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
~ If bills are rectangular, how come they keep rolling in?
~ If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway?
~ If "con" is the opposite of "pro," then what is the opposite of progress?
~ If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?
~ If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
~ If it's true that we are all here to help others, then what exactly are all the others here for?
~ If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
~ If mother always knows best, what happens when two mothers disagree?
~ If someone has a mid-life crisis while playing hide & seek, does he automatically lose because he can't find himself?
~ If space is a vacuum, who changes the bag?
~ If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
~ If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
~ If the shortest distance between two points is a line, why does waiting in a line take so long?
~ If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
~ If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning.
~ If you think about it, Adam had more trouble than any of the rest of us buying his Father a gift for Father's Day. I mean, what do you get somebody who's Everything?
~ Incompetents invariably make trouble for people other than themselves.
~ Indecision is the key to flexibility.
~ Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but she can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.
~ Instead of having "answers" on a math test, they should just call them "impressions"--and if you got a different "impression." so what? Can't we all just get along?
~ Interchangeable parts won't.
~ Is a leak in the back of a boat a stern warning?
~ Is it my imagination or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
~ Is it time for your medication or mine?
~ Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
~ Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
~ Is Marx's tomb a communist plot?
~ Is Walt Disney Productions a Mickey Mouse operation?
~ Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
~ It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living.
~ Laughter is like changing a baby's diaper: It doesn't permanently solve any problems, but it makes thing more acceptable for awhile.
~ Live as you wish your kids would.
~ Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun every year.
~ Love is like a rose. You have to see past the thorns to appreciate its beauty.
~ Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
~ Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
~ Money isn't everything...there's credit cards, money orders, and travelers checks.
~ "More hay, Trigger?" "No thanks, Roy, I'm stuffed."
~ No job is so simple that it can't be messed up.
~ No one ought to be so pessimistic that he can't see some good in other people's problems.
~ Now there's a list of the Ten Most Neurotic People...it's called The Best-Stressed List.
~ Oh Lord, give me patience...and GIVE IT TO ME NOW!
~ One time my kids wanted to surprise me with a good breakfast in bed on Father's Day. They put a cot in the kitchen.
~ Pity poor old George Washington. He couldn't blame his troubles on the previous administration.
~ Preach the gospel at all times. Use words if necessary.
--selected from Mikey's Funnies.
Inspiration, News, Devotionals, Humor & More to Start Your Day!
My Pastor's Message of the Day--Updated each weekday!
Introducing Pastor David Watson, Central Assembly, Springfield, Missouri
Feel like pokin' around Peggie's Place?
START HERE or skip straight to the ROOMS!.
Have fun--and should you get lost, scroll to the end of a page for a directory.
The Devotional Buffet--for over 500 archived devos at Peggie's Place!
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For more humor, visit The Fun Room at Peggie's Place!
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Peggie's blog, "Fun 'n Faith for the Soul" is no longer available.
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Celebrating God's goodness . . . . . . 16 million and more!
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Thanks, AddMe, for promoting Peggie's Place, including my new TWITTER page!Most of the music playing at Peggie's Place originates from Songs of Praise.
Additional (previously named) original source for some midis: Gilberto Barreto.
Visit this great Web site to hear beautiful tunes by many talented artists. CDs are available.5*-places to visit at Peggie's Place: Tickles 'n Truth . . . The Devotional Buffet
All the rooms at Peggie's Place!All Scriptures on this website, including all applications, etc., are from the King James Version of The Holy Bible, public domain, unless otherwise noted.
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A safety tip: Internet links and material may include other links and/or material which do not reflect my views or yours, Christian or otherwise. Please choose wisely and use with discretion! And if you find an ugly spider hiding in a dark corner, you may smash it with a broom--I hate offensive stuff too!
Report problems to pbohanon@peggiesplace.com. Copyright 1996-2016 by Peggie C. Bohanon, Springfield, MO. - pbohanon@peggiesplace.com. - All rights reserved.