I have good news for you. The first 80 years are the hardest. The second 80 are a succession of birthday parties.
Once you reach 80, everyone wants to carry your baggage and help you up the steps. If you forget your name or somebody else's name, or an appointment, or your own telephone number, or promise to be 3 places at the same time, or can't remember how many grandchildren you have, you need only explain that you are 80.
Being 80 is a whole lot better than being 70. At 70 people are mad at you for everything. At 80 you have the perfect excuse no matter what you do. If you act foolishly, it's your second childhood. Everybody is looking for symptoms of softening of the brain.
Being 70 is no fun at all. At that age they expect you to retire to a house in Florida and complain about your arthritis, (they used to call it lumbago), and you ask everybody to stop mumbling because you can't understand them. (Actually your hearing is about 50 percent gone.)
If you survive until you are 80, everybody is surprised that you are still alive. They treat you with respect just for having lived so long. Actually they seem surprised that you can walk and talk sensibly.
So please, folks, try to make it to 80. It's the best time of life. People forgive you for anything. If you ask me, life begins at 80.
--Found circulating the Internet via email.
Now before anyone gets upset, I need to let you know that I
am not calling God's people chickens or pigs. But there is
a lot of similarity between some chickens, some pigs, and
some Christians. I will even submit to you that the actions
around the barn yard could be a reflection of the church
life of some Christians. Lets take a look at the lessons we
learn from barn yard church.
1. Walking through the barn or the barn yard does not make
you a chicken, a cow, or a pig. Many times we assume that
everyone who comes through the church, joins or gets
baptized is a Christian. Nothing could further from the
truth. Every farmer knows that he must identify those
animals within his barn yard. This is a fundamental truth
of barnyard doctrine.
2. The farmer feeds "his own" and has no intention of
providing for any animal which is not his. Feral animals,
left in the barnyard, will eat the food away from those
cows, chickens, and pigs who are rightfully there. When
animals who are out of place eat all the food, the barnyard
animals will not grow as they should. This is true in
church also. When pastors and leaders are devoted to the
goats and not the sheep, the sheep will go lacking.
3. There are barn yard folks who only want to be
spectators. Around the barn yard there are dogs, cats, and
birds who belong there, but who will never participate in
production on the farm. They will stand by and look, but
won't give or do anything toward the objectives of the
farm. This happens a lot in churches. Some people come for
the singing, and some won't come at all. They should be
there, but they are not. They too are spectators.
4. Some of the farm residents never do more than
participate. Some chickens will give the eggs for
breakfast; some cows will give the milk for butter. The
same is true at church. Some members will give a little
money, some will attend on Sundays', and some will even
join an auxiliary, but most will not go any farther. They
will never help make up what is truly needed. Being a
participant in church does not mean that you are committed.
This truth, leads us to the next item in our rural
koinonia, the issue of commitment.
5. In order to eat breakfast, someone must meet their
destiny with commitment. Pigs and the rest of the cows know
about commitment. For the farmer to enjoy his breakfast,
these pigs and cows must give all they have. You see, there
will not be bacon or sausage or steak for the farmer until
a pig or cow gives his or her life. The same is true in
Church. In order for God's plans to be manifested in any
church, there must be someone willing to live sacrificially
in order to satisfy the needs of the master.
6. Healthy farm animals grow and reproduce. Every farmer
knows that if he gives his livestock enough food and
protects them from the weather, the natural outcome should
be growth and reproduction. Happy farm animals will produce
more healthy farm animals. Churches work the same way.
Healthy Christians should grow spiritually and numerically.
7. Sick and hurt barn yard animals will infect others and
reduce the production of the farm. Farmers limit the
exposure that sick animals have to the rest of the
livestock. Left alone, wounded animals will attack and
inflict pain on others as a result to their pain. A truism
in churches would be that "hurt folks hurt folks". In
other words, people who are hurting may hurt others around
them as a result of their pain. The farmer's two step
solution to this also works at church. First, limit the
exposure to others who may be vulnerable, then apply
healing liniment to the injured creature.Ê
8. You cannot ride on a chicken and you cannot plow with a
duck. The old saying goes "You can't make a silk purse from
a sows ear". This truth is often lost in the church.
Churches often place members in jobs they should not have
for reasons that are unimportant. Churches must learn to
place every member in the right job for that member.
9. Finally, Every farm survives on God's providence. The
one thing that every farmer knows is that success or
failure does not rest totally in his or her hands. God
working with him, is one commodity that every farm must
have. This is never more evident than in the life of a
Church. Scripture teaches that "unless the Lord builds the
house, those who labor - labor in vain". A commitment to
God's ways and prayer is required by the farmer and the
Christian.
Any type of success, be it spiritual, personal, or
professional, will require both involvement and commitment.
However, we can never assume that our projects and planning
will be enough. On the farm or in the church, it always
takes God!
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C Copyright 2002 All Rights Reserved James M. Brown
email address: mailto:bishop@victoryreport.com
Bishop James 'I Feel God' Brown is the founder and Sr. Pastor of Victory
International Church in Fort Worth, TX. He is in demand locally and
nationally as a revivalist, conference speaker, and Seminar Leader. To
obtain a list of other articles send an email to: article_digest@1000churches.org or visit 1000Churches.org: Kingdom Ministry on the Net.
A Fun, Faith 'n Funny Bone Feature 
