A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a
human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very
small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a
human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
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A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while
they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what
the drawing was? The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl
replied, "They will in a minute."
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A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her
five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother,"
she asked, "is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our
brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family)
answered, "Thou shall not kill."
...................................................................
An honest seven-year-old admitted calmly to her parents that Billy Brown
had kissed her after class.
"How did that happen?" gasped her mother.
"It wasn't easy," admitted the young lady, "but three girls helped me
catch him."
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One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes
at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother has several
strands of white hair sticking
out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your
hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and
make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for while and then said,
Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
...................................................................
A three-year-old went with his dad to see a litter of kittens. On
returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother that there were two
boy kittens and two girl kittens.
"How did you know?" his mother asked.
"Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied. "I think it's
printed on the bottom."
.................................................................
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grownup
and say, 'There's Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael. He's a
doctor."
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the
teacher. She's dead."
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A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying
make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head,
the blood, as you know, would
run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary
position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted,
"Cause yer feet ain't empty."
--found circulating the Net via email.
Moses and the people were in the desert, but what was he going to do
with them?
They had to be fed, and feeding 2 or 3 million people requires a lot of food.
According to the Quartermaster General in the Army, it is reported that
Moses would have to have had 1500 tons of food each day. Do you know
that to bring that much food each day, two freight trains, each at least a
mile long, would be required!
Besides you must remember, they were out in the desert, so they would
have to have firewood to use in cooking the food. This would take 4000
tons of wood and a few more freight trains, each a mile long, just for one
day.
And just think, they were forty years in transit.
And Oh yes! They would have to have water. If they only had enough to
drink and wash a few dishes, it would take 11,000,000 gallons each day
and a freight train with tank cars, 1800 miles long, just to bring water!
And then another thing!
They had to get across the Red Sea at night. Now, if they went on a
narrow path, double file, the line would be 800 miles long and would require
35 days and nights to get through. So there had to be a space in the Red
Sea, 3 miles wide so that they could walk 5000 abreast to get over in one
night.
But then, there is another problem...............each time they camped at the
end of the day, a campground two-thirds the size of the state of Rhode
Island was required, or a total of 750 square miles long........ think of it!
This much space for camping.
Do you think Moses figured all this out before he left Egypt? I think not!
You see, Moses believed in God. God took care of these things for him.
Now do you think God has any problem taking care of all your needs?
I asked the Lord to bless you As I prayed for you today. To guide you and
protect you as you go along your way.......... His love is always with you,
His promises are true, And when we give Him all our cares, You know He
will see us through.
Our God is an Awesome God!!Ê
So when the road you're traveling on seems difficult at best, just remember
I'm praying and God will do the rest.Ê
--found circulating the Net via email.
A Fun, Faith 'n Funny Bone Feature 
